Whats happening to me?

Christian

Im 13 and this is my story

Age 6 (nighttime): I was trying to sleep when i saw my angel statue blink, so i got scared and covered up more, i saw it flipping through pages of the bible, so i screamed and ran into my grandma's room. I had to sleep with her cuz i was scared. Then she fell asleep. I then saw a poptart and a popsicle with a spaceship appear on the dresser. I started to shake my grandma and asked if she saw it. She didnt. Noone but me did. I saw the poptart talk to the popsicle and drive off in a blue car. I then said a prayer with my grandma because i was literally scared the **** out of. After hearing "please have your angels watch over us and keep us safe throughout the night, amen" i closed my eyes and opened them to see 3 demons posing as cardboard angels circling around the bed. My eyes were open and i shook my grandma but still, nothing. So i shut my eyes tight and whispered jesus christ please help me and opened them and they were gone. I saw my grandpa that night before bedtime. So when i finally fell asleep, My 1st and only nightmare yet hit. My dog pierre got hit by a bus and hung, and me and my grandpa were in the front room and everything was swirly and me and my grandpa were saying a poem or something when a voice said dont say it its a death saying! So i said it and lightning flashed and i jumped and woke up. My sister also saw a black cat but that was it for her.We later moved out of that house and i suddenly started to have an uncontrollable fear of ghosts and crunching my footbone.

Age 12 (day and night) : i got into eminem and that and got addicted. I then learned that he sold his soul to the devil and i searched up how and what it is online. it said How to summon satan and sell your soul. the deal from what i read said you can have WHATEVER EVEN 300 YEARS OF LIFE ON EARTH, in exchange to burn in hell afterwards. So i got more into it and tried to sell it but satan wouldnt show up. Then i heard a voice saying christian your making a mistake (i am full christian, reborn and wanna be baptised) so i stopped. ( i called satan almighty :( )



A few months later....

i started to get into withcraft and magic. I used the online oouji board ONCE NEVER AGAIN. I made a wand and found spells. But they wouldnt work. Eventually i stopped



March 9, 2013
I was at my uncles funeral when i got the sudden urge to go in the EMPTY room. So i went back and said my goodbyes and cried. (my uncle was the closest person to me and my WHOLE school bullies me). While i was crying, i felt this cold breathing, down my neck, but noone was there. Then i got warm and knew it was my uncle. as an angel. So a few days after that i was in my room and out of nowhere i heard a voice saying "i love you" and i swear to god it was my uncle's sick voice. Then he showed up in my dreams as an angel and talked to me.



Can someone please help!?!?!? NEED TO KNOW!!! :(



p.s. NOTHING RUDE LIKE BEFORE NO I AM NOT HIGH IM SERIOUS

Answer
You may want to talk to a professional, either a psychologist or a therapist to deal with the anxiety and grief you feel. I am so sorry to hear about your uncle, if you ever need someone to talk to just shoot me an e-mail. I lost my father so I know somewhat how it feels.

You could also try talking to your minister about the demons. Just remember that God is a loving God. He won't let anything happen to you, His precious child. Just stay away from the witchcraft and magic- they really aren't a good idea. If you stick close to God's side, you will be protected from satan.

You sound like you need to talk to someone more in depth about this. I'm no professional, but I am a christian and I have experience with dealing with anxiety, or if you just need a friend, I'm here for you.

I'll be praying for you!

What mental illness is this?

Anne C

If you're having a deja vu moment with this question, ignore:

I'm 19, a girl, and for years I've been afraid of adults, children, elderly, people of all sorts! I'm especially afraid of people larger than me (obese or just plain TALL), since they make me feel so small, weak and intimidated. Children tend to be loud, brave, judgmental, and that intimidates me as well. Adults seem even worse. I am afraid to go out in public. Not even to the grocery store. I can barely even call the pizza man over the phone. If I do go out in public with parents, i'd just bolt outside on a bench and wait for my parents to finish shopping and leave for home. I'm usually the first one in the door. I just run to my room, and slam it shut, and try to catch my breath, not even helping with the groceries. Then I just flop on my bed, cover my head, and sleep in to 6pm (in time for dinner) the next day. I barely eat, as well. I dont even enjoy going out into the kitchen, since its next to the living room, which is a big space lots of people are invited into. Even when there's no one there, I hate going in. I feel people are staring into me and can see me, my thoughts, etc.

I prefer animals to people, and I have 4 pets so far. I fear that when im out of the house, i'd become an animal hoarder. I can imagine myself with my dream animals on a farm. Buffalo, horses, chickens, a lot of dogs...

Im afraid of loud noises, and I have paranoia. Not the normal "after watching a scary slasher movie" kind. This is constant. I'm constantly looking around my shoulder, shivering in fear (I mainly do that in public, which gives off a bad impression), and I feel people are watching. When I think of a song, I dont sing out loud because I think people will hear me, although the house is so empty. I cant even talk to my animals when i'm home alone. I'm afraid of people hearing my voice, as well. So, I am usually very quiet.

If a visitor comes to our house, i'm locking my door and in my room the whole time. I do badly with meeting strangers.

I hate being hugged or touched by anyone (esp not handshaking), including my parents. If I see a person coming towards me in public, I bolt the other direction. Gosh, i'd even run and yell. If I find the confidence to go into a store (empty ones like petstores or bookstores), and i'm walking into an aisle, If I see a person standing there, I just back away quickly, and move a good distance away.

I barely look into a mirror to see how I look. I'm just discusted by my face, skin, hair, and very thin body. I'm 5'8" and 107 pounds.

Forgot to add one more thing! If I see large groups of people in public, I feel they're staring and saying something about me. I sometimes think I can hear them, but it's probably in my head, well, I don't actually know, so I just bolt away.

I am pretty nocturnal nowadays, awake until 4am due to a gaming addiction (my main source of interaction), then I sleep until 6pm or later. If I miraculously wake up at 3pm, that's considered 'early' for me.

I dont have school anymore (THANK GOD). I had online school (because I cant cope with socializing), but my gaming addiction and fear of contacting the teacher to explain my inactivity made her drop me out of the class. I was too afraid to log back in, because I would fear an angry email from her or something. So, I put it off. And now, I have no classes. Now, I feel worse. I have no means of graduating now.

Anyway, yes, I have been hospitalized once for being caught looking up methods to... You know. I've learned my lesson, I believe.

Oh, and anti-depressants seem to make me either ill or sleepy. Believe me, i've been on a lot of doses (some were high doses) and types. None work significantly (even over the years!). I am now off all of them and am not getting any mental help.

I usually stay at home, in my room, and I refuse to go shopping or run errands. Half of my day, im laying in bed, not willing to do anything. I cover my head with a blanket since it feels safer.

So, any ideas on whats wrong with me? My parents refuse to think anything's wrong with me, and I think my mom knows, but she thinks that her family is being dishonored by my behavior and no one should have any insanity if they are deeply as religious as she is. I dont even go to her church anymore, since I dont feel comfortable there at all.

PS, talking to a friend wont help, because I haven't had one since elementary school. I barely speak to my mom unless I am sick or want something, and almost not at all to my dad! He cant speak to me without yelling.

Answer
The list is endless but you cannot really treat youself.
However,If I was suffering, I would try and conquer one fear at a time.
For example, You know that a fear of a mouse is silly. So is a fear of loud noises. A mouse might make you jump and so might a loud sound but its nothing to be scared of.
So, when you are alone, turn up the radio or tv a little louder. It won't hurt you but make you feel scared but also you know its silly to be scared.Do it once a day until you are not scared anymore, then move on to your next fear.
Sorry you have such dipstick parents they are not helping and possibly making your conditoin worse. Email if you need an online friend.

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